The guest list can be one of the most stressful aspects of the wedding planning, but it needn’t be if you go through our list of handy questions to ask yourself about which people to invite; it doesn’t have to be everyone you have ever met!
It might sound obvious, but have you met them? Lots of couples are introduced to people for the first time at their wedding – shocking! It can be tricky to keep the guest list pared down, but distant relatives, business associates and your parents’ friends from work don’t necessarily have to be invited, no matter how many lovely stories they have heard about your plans
When did you last see them? If you haven’t clapped eyes on them in over a year or kept in touch with them by phone or social media regularly, then you probably shouldn’t invite them.
Do you know what is going on in their life right now? You should be surrounded by guests who are interested in your relationship and your life and you should be interested in theirs. Your guests will be people who know who you are today and will probably be around in five years time, not people you last saw five years ago.
Were you at their wedding? Tricky for family weddings you might have attended, but for friends that you have since lost touch with you don’t have to reciprocate if you haven’t stayed close. It can be a reason to get in touch with an invitation though, if you really want that person back in your life.
For friends from work sometimes it is only the fact that you spend your working life together that you have in common, so ask yourself whether you would still be in touch if you weren’t working together. Some colleagues will stay in your life long term, regardless of work situations, but don’t feel you have to invite the whole office!
If you spend holidays, birthdays and special occasions with the particular family member or person then they obviously mean a lot to you. These people should definitely be on your guest list. End of story.
Are you inviting the extended family? If there are several cousins and you are close to a couple of them you should still probably invite them all; you don’t have to spend too much time with people you don’t get along so well with, but it is better to avoid a family fallout!
Can you be yourself around this person? A wedding is a very personal occasion; it is lovely to have people celebrating with you, but do you want your boss recounting the evening party shenanigans back in the office?
Is this person a positive influence in my life? Don’t automatically dismiss people who are sometimes a bit down or negative about life, no one wants a miserable guest, but your invitation could be a very positive and welcome thing for that person, it shows them that you care and want them to be part of your special day and might be just the push they need to enjoy life a bit more.
Would you keep in touch if you moved away? Or visit if you were in town? We think this is a pretty good test of whether the friendship merits an invitation; most of us have a friend or two who we can pick up with where we left off whether that was two weeks ago or six months.
Would you change the wedding date if this person couldn’t attend? If this answer is “yes”, then it’s a no-brainer! This person is really important to you and having them at your wedding means the world to you both!
We hope that drawing up your guest list doesn’t become too stressful!! , but remember the golden rule that it’s YOUR day and those who matter most to you should be there, and if that doesn’t include so and so from up the road that mum/dad has been friends with for years – stick to your guns!!
This is a guest post by Cherish Bridal http://www.cherishbridal.co.uk
Tel 01606 351900